Monday, August 23, 2010


To say that today has been  “one of those days”  is an understatement. It started out like a good day. I got up early and began my day like always…walking the pups, feeding Annie ( my outside dog), walking Annie, giving her clean water, and then watering my almost dead as door nails tomato plants. Afterwards, I went inside and made my bed, swept my floors, and made out checks for my bills.
I have been wanting to paint my living room, so after I got all that over and done with, I got on line to Home Depot and checked on paint colors. I want a neutral color this time, so that it will go with any furniture or curtains, etc. Well, you wouldn’t believe  just how many neutral colors there are!  I finished up on line, and called my sister to see if she needed to go to town when I went. She did, so I told her to be ready in 30 minutes and I went and got my shower.
Oh, it felt so good taking that shower.  I felt so much better after being out in the heat and humidity this morning. I quickly threw my clothes and makeup on and actually had a little spring in my step when I walked out onto the front porch and closed the front door. I knew it as soon as I heard the door click shut and I could have just fell down and had a dang temper tantrum right then and there, had I not been on my front porch where everyone could see me.
But as it turned out, I didn’t have to worry about anyone seeing me…oh noooooooooooo…..because there was NOBODY around. For once in it’s life, my whole street was empty and as dead as a ghost town. Remember those old westerns  that use to be on TV  years ago with the tumbling weeds always blowing across the dirt roads ? Yeah…it was like that.
Luckily, I had my cell phone, so I called a couple of folks hoping that someone would be there to help me…..but oh nooooooooooooo….everybody was gone. Even my kids were gone. So here I am stuck outside in 90 plus degree heat, with no house key, no car key, nothing …. but me.
So, I walk around back and drag the water hose holder, which looks like a plastic square box,to a window. I try to get my leg up to the top of it to get on it…nope…can’t. So I lay my cloth purse down on it to cushion my old knees and get up on it . I slowly try to stand up on it and  finally got upright and started trying to take the storm window off. It wouldn’t budge. I get down and head toward the old wood shed… which is locked with one of the  keys that is inside my house.
I am able to find a pair of old rusted catfish skinners that Danny use to use, in a catch all box under the shed, so I grab those and head back to the hose box under the window. I ease myself back on on it and using the catfish skinner handles, I pry up the hateful storm window and toss it on the ground . Then I try to raise the old window (that has been in this house ever since it was built by the cotton mill eons ago)…..and of course…it doesn’t budge.  By this time, I am sweating bullets and so pissed off at myself, that, as my granny use to say,  I could whoop my own butt.     
I say a few choice and ungodly words and then go at that old window like a demon child with those skinners and it finally comes unstuck and raises. Oh…I felt so victorious…..Until… I tried to raise myself high enough to get a leg (or even my head) inside that window. There was no way on God’s green earth that I could get my leg that high and still be normal. And no way I could jump up and fly in that window like a bird either….so I step down off my  box and did what I had not wanted to do….
I called Greensboro PD.
The 911 dispatcher was nice enough considering me being the fool locked outside on Mill Street calling but she informed me that they were on a call and would be there shortly. After a good while, I see the white police car coming. The policeman walks around back with me, but he was as short as I and could not reach the window either. So he had to call back up. Well, the next one was as about as short but must have been more agile, since he was able to (after pulling off  his police tool belt) pull his weight up enough to get through the dang window.
And wouldn’t you know it…As soon as his leg went in, Hallie, my Chihuahua and the other three ( aka mini pit bulls ) go into  attack mode. It was only when the other policeman informed him that he had to go all the way through the house to the front door and unlock it, that he jokingly yelled for his tazer!
So here I am…with a policeman running through my house with four Chihuahuas nipping at his legs…Man…If embarrassment could kill you, I would be as dead as my tomato plants.
Needless to say I am so grateful to those two angels that we call cops.
This was just the beginning of my day today…there is more
I am too tired to go into that just yet.


Adirondackcountrygal said...

You should be a comedy writer. You had me giggling away. I'm not laughing at your misfortune of course, but the way you wrote this story was priceless! God bless the police dept!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

You poor thing. I can just feel your frustration. Thankfully you got some help, but that there is more to your bad day is not a good thing. It's amazing how when things get bad, they only get worse. They say if we didn't have the bad we wouldn't appreciate the good, but it's sure is tough going through. That's one reason I always say I love ordinary days. Take care and may only good things come your way. I know you will appreciated them.

madcobug said...

Glad they finally got into your house. Now what else could go wrong?

Jayne said...

Awwwwwww Carlene...... poor you. Having agoraphobia & claustrophobia i would have died.

I am sorry that you had to get so stressed after such a great start....but..... happy that you were rescued by the (as we Brits would call them) the 'boys in blue '

Heres hoping today makes up for yesterday and turns out to be a great one for you
Jayne x

Barbara said...


Arlene (AJ) said...

Don't mean to laugh, but reading your words sure got me in that mode. Needed to hear that someone else was having one of those I can't believe it kind of days. Keep those keys close at hand so you don't have to call those "Angels" to come and help you out since your lovey's were after him, they might be too busy to come and help you the next time. Have you thought of getting into comedic writing, you'd be great.

Myra said...

If it wasn't such a fluke, it would be funny. Not to laugh at your expense, but you have to admit the visual you paint of the dogs nipping at the policeman's heels! On the other hand, your house is pretty secure!

Lisa said...

Ohhhh Carlene... I am so sorry you got locked out but it was so very entertaining to read about it the way you wrote about it!! You are one funny gal!! You sure have a gift for writing!!! I am so glad the policemen came and that the dogs didn't eat him alive LOL!!!!
Lisa in Kentucky